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Practical Tips for Managing Stress

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By Gayle A. Roberts, CNP, MSN, RN

September 10, 2014

Lately, when I speak to family and friends, it seems like everyone complains of stress after the, "Hello how are you?” I ask them to elaborate and most complained of work demands (doing the work of two), meeting requests, and/or the challenges of caring for old or young family members and handling household maintenance issues. I am beginning to think stress is the new norm.

So maybe we should accept that most people are stressed and move on in the conversation by allowing them to share their concerns. In turn, we can encourage them and help them prioritize which stressors are most important to tackle. As interested friends, we can often see how others can reorder their lives easier than they can.

A wise doctor once told me that "Stress is living." Everyone else was telling me to avoid stress, which I found impossible to do. It was there. So, I had to find out how to deal with it.

Stress is not good for our health. It increases our risk of heart attack, strokes, irritable bowel syndrome, colds, flu, and more serious illnesses like Multiple Sclerosis. As stress continues for a long time, our adrenal glands that manage our "fight or flight" response to stress produce increased amounts of sterols and the gland fatigues. This creates a run-down feeling, can make us more anxious, and can decrease our immune systems so much that we can become more vulnerable to diseases such as cancer. Stress hormones even increase our weight, usually around our middle, which increases heart disease risk.

To manage stress you need to use a multitude of tools. First, admit that there will always be stress. Then you will be able to manage it, knowing that while it may decrease, it will not go away. Second, make a prioritized "to do" list and keep the list manageable. Checking off items on the list one by one will give you a great deal of satisfaction. The list will keep you focused on one item at a time instead of thinking of everything all at once. True, sometimes an item may be on the list for days or weeks, but you will get it done; it’s O.K.

  • If you are feeling overwhelmed at work, try discussing it with your supervisor. Chances are that he/she is feeling overwhelmed too, and perhaps you can both work on finding more help or allowing more time to complete your tasks. Asking for help is not a weakness, but a strength.
  • Stay away from others who overly complain of stress, especially co-workers. Admit that you all have stress, so work on encouraging others and being positive, which I bet will be much harder than complaining.
  • Surround yourself with positive people. Those who will listen, help you to refocus, and say, "You can do it," or "It’s O.K. if you can't do it all, how can I help?"
  • Stop spending $100 dollars on a 10 cent problem. Know that household duties and other worries usually can wait.
  • Spend time every day on yourself, 15 minutes. This sounds so easy, but I challenge you to do it and be successful. You are important. If your health should fail, it will be difficult to be there for work or others. Take a walk; listen to music; take a bubble bath; read; rest; and/or watch television. You should be the only one doing the activity.
  • When you do take time for yourself, if you find yourself feeling guilty as you think about your "to do" list, try staring at something and take deep breaths in and out. This gives your body more oxygen as most stressed people do not breathe deeply.  Every time a stressor comes to mind, stop it and go back to refocusing. This takes practice, but it works!
  • Plan a "no work, no thinking about it time." Pray, He will give you strength.
  • Avoid guilt. Guilt is never a good emotion. When asked to do things outside of work and family, practice saying, "No, I am sorry I have a prior comittment, but do call me again." I have a hard time saying no, and when I did say yes, I often regretted it or what I called sabotaging myself. The obligations will most likely always be there. I was so bad at saying, "No" that I had a poster of the word on my refrigerator or near my phone.
  • Sleep well. Eat well, not on the run. Take a bubble bath. This sounds goofy but do something a five year old would do, like ride a swing, I guarantee you will laugh, which massages your organs.
  • Lastly, try to make lemonade out of lemons. Since we all seem to be stressed, let’s all help one another. Say kind things at work to others. Praise others for a job well done or for just coming to work every day. Hug. Listen and help others prioritize. Offer to help if you are able. Understand when others say "No" even if it discourages you.

Be positive in your life and for others. Know that if things become overwhelming, or you find you cannot focus on one thing, or that you dwell on a mistake made instead of the good things you have done, your healthcare provider may be able to help. When natural methods of managing stress do not work well, there are many good medications available to help with stress or anxiety. There are medications to help you sleep that can be used. You may need tested to see if you have thyroid problems that may be making you fatigued or more anxious than usual. Your healthcare provider can assist you with other tools to decrease stress.

It seems like we are all in this together these days, so we may as well help each other out with peace, love and kindness.

Gayle A. Roberts, CNP, MSN, RN is a retired nurse practitioner and college nursing professor who volunteers for Trinity Hospital Twin City.

 

 

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